Recipes
We had to include this recipe because, sooner or later, you're going to end up with a few metal kebab skewers kicking around at the back of your kitchen drawer and you're gonna wanna know wot to do with them.
COLD PASTA FOR DISORGANISED SITUATIONS
Sometimes, you gotta cook something, but you don't know what time your guests are going to come, or how many, or even if they'll show up at all. And that's whenyou need to know about "Cold Pasta for disorganised situations.
These are hot toasted sandwiches but the wonderful secret of this recipe is that you can make it in a bog-standard frying pan ... which means that you don’t need to have a great, dirty, cumbersome, unwanted toasted sandwich-making machine cluttering up your entire life for the rare occasions when you want to eat a hot toasted sarnie.
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Here’s an easy meal idea that’s great if you’ve got lots of people coming around and you can’t be bothered to spend ages cooking something complicated for them. This stuff is good for parties or as something that’ll keep warm for a long time - so it won’t matter if your ungrateful guests come late.
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THE BEST SALAD DRESSING IN THE WORLD
Anybody who says that they “Like salads” is in serious need of a visit to the shrink. The only way to make these rabbit weeds taste delicious is by coating them with the best salad dressing in the world. So here’s the recipe!
Life ain’t a bed of roses and there are some very very unpleasant things that are going to happen to you before you shuffle off this mortal coil. Stuff like: your first car crash, some serious dental surgery, visiting France, ODing on something dangerous, putting small injured animals out of their misery, and eating a Deep Fried Mars Bar.
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“It tastes better than a Crunchie Bar but it looks like a dog’s turd”. That was the public’s reaction to Blubber Bars when we organised a special street tasting session.
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SMART ASS GEEKS’ CHICKEN CURRY
Smart ass geeks love to make out that everything they do is insanely difficult when, in fact, you know that they’re really only stupid geeks and that they ain’t really that clever. Same with this curry recipe. It’s a geek recipe because it tastes great - better than any takeaway - but it’s full of short cuts and any dumb ass geek could make it. Even you! Just follow this recipe.
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Tuna Goo Potatoes is a boftastic recipe for complete idiots that you can do anytime but it is especially good as party food cos you can prepare most of it beforehand and most people seem to like it.
Also, it’s dirt cheap.
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Spaghetti Bolognese. It’s the cliché signature dish of bedsit land. Nevertheless, and because this is what GET STUFFED is all about, we thought that we should give you a totally idiot proof recipe.
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Have you ever looked at those huge, cheap, vacuum-sealed packets of bacon off-cuts that they sell in supermarkets and wondered what on Earth you could do with them? Bacon Scrap Pie is the answer.
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CORNED BEEF HASH & SENSIBLE VEGETABLE
This is a favourite GET STUFFED recipe that costs peanuts, (actually, by weight, much less than the cost of peanuts).
The quantities that we give in this recipe are for one person. If you're cooking for more, then just multiply it all up.
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Why’s it called “Angry Idiots Thai Chicken”? Easy ... it’s coz every time we cook this dish, there’s always some dude trying to muscle into the kitchen to angrily announce, “That’s not the way to prepare Thai Chicken”!
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If you look in the butcher’s fridge in your local supermarket, you’ll notice that massive big slabs of sinister-looking, meaty meat are being sold for peanuts. If you look at the label, you’ll notice that this stuff is usually pork.
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Remember the miracle when Jesus turned some fish & bread into a picnic big enough to feed 5000? Well, imagine the hassle there’d been any veggies in the crowd. Imagine them all throwing up their skinny, anaemic arms and whining about whether or not it was OK to eat the fish. It wouldn’t have been a miracle, it would have been a good Old Testament-style punch up.
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People are scared of fish and it’s no wonder coz, if you muck up a fish recipe, it’s often an expensive mistake that’ll just taste of boney muck. So here’s our fave fish dish which comes from page 27 of the “Get Stuffed” Cookbook. It’s a doodle to make and it’s so good, you’ll be licking the pan clean.
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